'Glamour Bump': the adventures of a lumbering slutty hippo

There is no slowing the growth of the bump.  Most recent scan on Friday again showed the two little guys, this time more crammed in than ever.  The snuggly chaps are making their presence known with kicks and punches on a regular and daily basis as the battle between by abdominal wall and their increasing size continues.

As the bump challenges my wardrobe, I try to remember that clothes are what humans do when we can't go naked.  But I am approaching the point where clothes are what I do when the spandex allows.  I wore a dress other day that boss remarked was looking more like a shirt.  I find the process of getting dressed a pretty comical experience.  Thank goodness (and modesty-sake) for my mother, who has kindly sent some maternity trousers and other bits over the Atlantic.  With them and digging to the far back reaches of my wardrobe, I might just make it the 9 months without having to resort to going to Tesco in my bathrobe.

The other day, hubbie and I were planning to head to town to do some weekend errands and was stood in a towel in front of the closet wondering what I could cram into.  In the back, the way back, was a pink stretchy dress. I wore it once, years ago, on a night out.  Back then, it's shocking pink colour paired with a just-above the knee hemline made it sexy but not too slutty.  I also had some glorious pink heels that rounded it off nicely that night. I wondered how far the lycra would be prepared to go as I pulled it on.  The bump forced the hemline a little higher than before and I was unsure of the colour with my belly.

Noting my curled up lip, Thom asked what the problem was.  The bright pink, which first drew me in, now seemed reminiscent of Miss Piggy.  I said the first words that came to mind.  'I look like a slutty hippo.'
He giggled and told me to get my shoes on so we could get going.  I opted for Uggs rather than the glorious heels, of course.  So off we went.  Time to let go of vanity, I thought.

We made our way around town, picking up little things we needed, including a much larger clothes horse in anticipation of much greater amounts of laundry to come.  At the checkout, the girl at the till exclaimed, 'You look so glamorous! Glamorous but with a bump!'  I was stunned but she was full of compliments as she scanned away, asking questions about how far along I was and all things pregnancy related.

As we left, I grabbed a sneaking glance of myself in the shop windows.  Admittedly, I still saw slutty hippo.  The extra girth seems so foreign to me.  But one amazing thing I'm learning is that beauty is far more inclusive than we can ever imagine.  Life lesson in there somewhere.